Heart of Worship

Wow! What a busy week this has been. I have spent every evening of this week with my church group and it has been such a blessing. It has left little time for any Britni time, but such a blessing. Tonight I accepted an invitation to go do something I had never done before and again that turned out be such a blessing. It fills my heart to make good friends that I know I can count on and really seek advice from and listen to them as well.

Wednesday, this last week, was Worship and Prayer night at church. It was led by a group of high school students. My heart is very broken for our youth so this was so nice to see this group serving The Lord. About 3/4 of the way through they played an older song, Heart of Worship. This has always been one of my favorite songs, but this time it broke me down and I cried. Not tears of hurt, but tears of thankfulness that God brought me back to a Heart of Worship, when I had walked so far away from him. Through the struggles in my life I can truly see God's grace and his mercy.

My past is something I have struggled with and often feared that it would define me for the rest of my life. I had someone tonight tell me that my past is a part of who I am and will always be, but I'm not the judge of what I deserve, God is. This is something that I know, but to have a friend reach out and tell me that really meant a lot.

Just as God has shown his grace in my life he also is great and ever merciful and gives us the best when we choose to follow him. I often pray the prayer that God will break my heart for what breaks his, but this was a challenge we were given this morning in church as well. In many ways, my heart does break for certain things, but I don't think that there is ever a point where I will come to where I can say that "ok, Lord, my heart is broken enough and I've cared enough, I'm done." This race that God sets before us is never done.

Right now, I'm really praying for something personal. I don't know the answers, I don't know where I'm being directed, I don't know why God is breaking my heart for this particular thing, but he is. All I can do and say is that I will run that race and follow God wherever he leads. I'm so thankful that he has brought me back to this Heart of Worship. Though there are tough times and answers may not always seem clear, being in the presence of The Lord is always the right thing to do and is never failing.